I think I did my best parenting before I had children! LOL
Before I had children I had all kinds of ideas as to how children should be raised and how my life would be. Picture perfect children; well behaved, well kept. They would sleep in their own beds, eat on schedule, and my life would change very little. We would go to museums, the zoo, and have long days lounging in the park. They would attend private schools and I would, while being active in the PTA,have plenty of time for myself. What a difference having children has made.
Somehow, someway I fell into what is called "attachment parenting." What does that mean? It felt better to have my son nursing in the bed with me at night instead of getting up and down all night. Dh and I had gotten to the point where we didn't sleep because we couldn't remember where we put ds. One of us would wake up and move him back to his cradle, the other would wake up and start looking for him in the bed. All three of us slept better when we decided all of us would sleep together. I nursed "on demand", not when I felt he should be hungry, but when he was hungry. And I nursed for 2 years. We spent lots of time together as a family. We disciplined by rewarding the behavior we desired instead of punishing him for the undesirable. We made our home a place in which it was easy to succeed.
As we added more members to our family we became more comfortable with this method of child raising. And of course our methods have changed to accomodate older children. We homeschool our children so that they can succeed in school. Children often have trouble in school because they are bored, not challenged, or just not getting it. We began to see that occurring while my son was in second grade. We removed that obstacle by homeschooling and teaching each child at his/her own level.
How is this working? I guess my son, who is now almost 11would be the best test. He doesn't sleep in my bed and hasn't for many years. He does however enjoy coming in some mornings and cuddling for a while. We are very close and talk about everything. We still try to reward the positive behavior and make it easy for the children to succeed. But now the rewards are different. All three of my children while not always well behaved are mostly so and we often get complemented from friends and family on their manners and ability to get along. The are not always well kept, both dds hate having their hair brushed, but they also don't like being dirty and enjoy getting dressed up (including hair pretties) when we go out. It may not be what I had expeceted, they have changed my life, but I believe those changes are for the better.
