A cousin sent me a message asking if we were going to be able to attend my Aunt and Uncles 50th wedding Anniversary party in November. I asked what was the date she said the 17th I apologized and had to decline because November is a busy month well she then asked if I had her address to send my donation for the party. I was shocked she then proceeded to tell me that she was expecting at least 150 from Al and I then 130 from each of the kids. I didn't know how to reply kinda shocked that she expects a donation. I called my Mom to ask her if she was going so I could at least send a gift she said they weren't going either due to a wedding out of the town the weekend before. Since that coversation I got a call from the Caterer wanting my credit card information cause the cousin told her I was paying for the food I had to tell her that she was mistaken cause I wasn't paying for food. Well that let off a hail storm of emails now I am being bombarded with calls texts and emails calling me all sorts of names. How do you handle this?
How close are you/have you been to this aunt and uncle and cousins?
Sounds pretty outrageous to me. IMO you did the right thing to not pay anything and I would go ahead and send a gift to your aunt and uncle directly. As to the fallout: ignore it. Someone that brazen isn't going to be swayed by anything you are going to say.
I havent seen them in over 10 years. I dont like this cousin at all thinks she is better then everyone else. I sent a nice email explaining why we can't make. She responds back with now my Aunt is in tears over this issue. To darn bad not my fault they didnt plan better .
WOW - this is one story for the books - I am sorry that you are going through this.
I agree - you weren't part of the "Planning Committee" so you are not required or expected by any means to contribute to the party. If you had been and had discussed it - then perhaps yes - but in this case . . . NO!!!
Sounds to me that you are not that close with your Aunt and Uncle - they should understand - at least I would hope!!
I would personally send a note directly to your Aunt and Uncle explaining your sadness for not being able to attend and leave it at that. You could explain to them that you were unaware of any of the planning for this party - you never know that your cousin has said to them (not that it really matters - but to at least give your side of the story). They may not even know - that is my guess!!
oh yeah - did your mom receive the same phone call with a request for a donation??? just curious. Is this Aunt/Uncle related to your mom or dad?? Now I'm curious!! sorry!
This is my Dads older brother, cousin talked to mom over fb because she doesn't have moms new number. My sisters all got the same message but I was the only one to get the call from the caterer seems that the cousin told my sisters I agreed to pay for catering I said NO I nnever agreed to that. I have my huge Winter Wonderland Extravaganza coming up and they know I am working hard on that. They all think it is crazy that she thinks we should donate to the party. My parents did their big 45th last year and didn't ask for a cent.
That's many levels of crazy. I don't think you owe her an explanation whatsoever. A simple, "I am unable to attend" should suffice. Follow that up with a 50th anniversary card to the couple and be done with it.