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*sigh* The tough stuff. My first "tough stuff" LO, actually. Possible trigger. Just wanted to give warning. Motivated by Simple Scrapbooks' Sept/Oct "Coping With Loss" section.
Journaling: Well, here it is, London. The last photo. Un-cropped, with all of its imperfections. If I would have known these were going to be the last photos taken of you, things would have been different. I would not have used this camera. And I would have taken more than four photos of you that day.
You wouldn’t be sitting on my bed. You wouldn’t have a silly dinosaur up by your head. I would have sat back a little so the photos would be more in focus. If I would have known these were going to be the last photos of you, I would have made sure they were perfect.
I didn’t know we’d lose you just a few weeks later. I wish I would have held you closer. I wish I would have kissed you over and over and over. I wish I would have taken more photos of us together… just me and you, my first niece.
I would have told you I loved you… not ten times a day, but every second I was with you. I would have asked, just for one night, if you could sleep in my room. I would have cuddled you every chance I got. I would have hugged you and never let go.
If I only would have known! But, Baby, I didn’t know. God was the only one who knew.
Yes, I would have done many things differently. But, London, there’s one thing I wouldn’t change, not for all the photos in the world.
I’m still so proud that I got to be the one… the one to take the last photo.
*******
We lost her to SIDS, January 26, 1995. I found the negatives for these photos a few months ago, and I've really been wanting to scrap them and journal. I wrote poems and little stuff like that back in 1995 (I was in 8th grade), but I haven't *really* journaled about her till now. Felt good. Really good. Love scrapping as therapy. :)
I love inking. :) Very much. :D
Thank you SO much for looking. If you've gotten this far on my description [novel], I appreciate it. This is a tough subject. Thank you again. :)
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So moving...remember the love! And i find scrapping the 'tough' stuff helps me too. Hugs to you.
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So touching and beautifully done. *hugs* to you! Thankyou for sharing.
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Oh what a cute baby and such a sad story.
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Im so sorry for your loss, I couldnt imagine how painful it is to lose such a young family member. Makes me want to hug my children close and never let them go.
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Beautiful page and so precious to journal! There are no words to say to mend your broken heart, but at least you got to know London for the short period of time you had him.
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beautiful page. Beautiful baby. God has been very happy for London's company all these years. God Bless You to scrap something so difficult.
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Wow I know that was really hard for you, you did a great job!!
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Oh my goodness. This page is just gorgeous. The journaling totally touched my heart. My heart breaks for you. This is a wonderful way to pay tribute. Love this page, even though the story behind it is so heart wrenching.
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This is beautiful. I'm so sorry for your loss.
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wow... amazing page
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I am so deeply sorry for your loss. The loss of a child has to be one of the hardes griefs to bear. Your page moved me tremendously as I just had a little girl this year. Your daughter is absolutely beautiful. What a cutie! I admire your courage and strength in sharing your story and for creating an absolutely beautiful memory of a gorgeous little girl. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
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It's a beautiful tribute to a beautiful little girl. My heart aches for you and my prayers are with you.
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WOW!!! You did such a beautiful job on this LO, the journaling is the most touching!!! I can't even imagine how difficult this was to do, but I can completely understand scrapping as therapy! This is a beautiful tribute to her!
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wow. such a beautiful tribute. the journaling and the design are fabulous. hugs.
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Such a beautiful way to honor your niece.
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What a wonderful tribute. I know it was hard but you touched a lot of people here with that sweet journaling. I love all the papers and embellies. Beautiful beautiful job! TFS
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what a beautiful page. I know this was hard for you. God bless.
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What an incredible tribute. BEAUTIFUL layout and touching journaling. Thanks so much for taking a step out on a limb and sharing it with the world!
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Wow! Wow! Beautiful job and what a story. The BG was perfect for this and the journaling just blows me away. Thank you for sharing.
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what a wonderful job you did!! my eyes welled up with tears just reading that. Amazing!! Beautiful work
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Sniff, sniff...you've done a marvelous job on this sweetie. It had to be terribly difficult. So beautiful! She was an angel then, and she's an angel now. HUGS!!
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I got to end just, couldn't see because of tears! You have a wonderful way with words! Well done on such a beautiful page!
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This is wonderfully done! It's beautiful in design and in content.
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Love this! the colors the pictures everything!
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What a beautiful little girl, and such a tragic story. This is a gorgeous layout, and you did a wonderful job with the heartfelt journaling.
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Wow, Reyanna, what a heartbreaking story and every parent's fear. I used to check constantly when my son was little to see if he was breathing. Even though it has been years, it is still a tragic loss. You did London an honor with this lo. Beautifully done.
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OMG! I'm so very sorry for your loss! You did a beautiful job scrapping this!
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HOW HEARTBREAKING. YOU DID A REMARKABLE JOB PUTTING IT IN TO WORDS AND SCRAPPING HER PRECIOUS PICURES.
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Oh Reyanna, this is unbelievable. Beautiful layout and journaling.
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Your niece London was a beautiful little girl. Your journaling was hard to get through when I knew the subject and even more so when I saw the date that you lost her. My DD was born on January 26, 2006. Every year that my daughter's birthday is celebrated, I will remember London with a prayer.
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The layout is beautiful, your journaling is heart wrenching....
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WOW... Reya .. this is absolutely beautiful.. just like the little girl in the pic... what a tough thing to experience.... she was beautiful... and the page leaves me speechless... with tears... beautifully done!
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What a beautiful memorial to a beautiful baby.
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beautiful! the photos are great...don't worry about it at least you have them and this page is wonderful:)
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This is really beautiful Lo and beautiful tribute. Hugs to you, and it is good to do therapy scrappin (brought tears to my eyes also)
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(Through my teary eyes) This is a beautiful tribute...good for you for doing it!
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This is gorgeous Reya!! Brought a tear to my eye!
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ONE WORD BEAUTIFUL
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This is a beautiful page and tribute to your niece! Scrappin' therapy is the best, keep it up and keep going! Great job! TFS!
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**HUGS** to you! This is a beautiful layout to celebrate a beautiful little life.
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*BIG HUG* You have done a beautiful Lo with these memories!!
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Beautiful.
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WOW. Gorgeous. Heart-string tugging. Amazing. Just beautiful.
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How very special!!! We lost a Grandson to SIDS at 4months too and I know the pain...This is so special to have these photos, and your LO is beautiful!
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cute, cute, cute!!!!!
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Beautiful page! Adorable pics!
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What a beautiful little girl and I am actually speechless as to what to say. I think your journaling said it all. God bless your family, Deborah
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This is a beautiful LO and the photos are perfect. You may not be very pleased w/these shots BUT look at her beautiful and bright smile. And to think...u got it on film!
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I think the journaling *needed* to wait until now, so your grown-up self could have the words to express what your 8th-grade self felt at the time. Thank you for sharing this. *HUG*
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Such a beautiful heartfelt lo!! And what a cute, precious Angel!!
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you did a wondersul job scrapping these photos. Your jouranling is perfectly sweet and heartfelt. This is truely a beautiful layout, beautiful baby, thanks for sharing :)
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I know this pain and you have scrapped this and journaled beautifully ...well done :)
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This is amazing journaling! What a fantastic tribute to gorgeous baby! Now, you will forever have her here. This is so touching!
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So sad...Such a beautiful smile. Beautiful page, just beautiful!
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This is a beautiful poignant Lo. It is good that you have done it, and she was so pretty.
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Scrapping is so theraputic. Lovely lo and tribute to your nice.
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So touching. Very sweet page and such heartfelt journaling. I'm so sorry for your loss.
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OMG I'm in tears, this is beautiful. I'm so sorry for your loss. Beautiful tribute, wonderful photos, and memories.
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Such a beautiful LO! Love the journaling... very touching, and honest. I'm so sorry for your loss, but I feel that this is a wonderful tribute to such a beautiful little baby. Thanks for sharing :o)
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I'm so sorry for your loss. This is a beautiful layout and beautiful journaling. Thankyou for sharing your tribute.
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i am so sorry for your loss. this couldn't be more perfect. really, really well done. hugs.
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Huggs. What a wonderful tribute of such a beautiful little girl
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Heartfelt and beautiful! Well done!
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really wonderful tribute.
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This is so amazingly touching, and heart-breaking, and courageous! Without the journaling, it would still be a beautiful layout - but with it, it's a masterpiece. Wow!
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This layout is an awesome tribute to her. I love that you did this and hope it helped you.
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Wow this is very touching. Hope you are feeling much better after scrapping about her. Love the papers u used too.
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Beautiful LO!!
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Love the journaling, very touching, gorgeous LO, love the papers you used
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beautiful LO
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So pretty! I love those papers! Great LO!
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This is an amazing page, very touching. Thank you for sharing
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Very touching layout and journaling . . .
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Heart breaking - but a great page, your journaling is amazing and the fact that you found the negatives now and were now able to journal this has to be significant. TFS
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Thanks for sharing such a beautiful, touching and heartfelt page.
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yep... your warning was needed... i have tears streaming down my face... you know i do... i'm such a sap. wow... you journaled this beautifully... i still have chills. (((((((hugs))))))) love you, girl!!!
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This is a beautiful lo, and the journaling is so touching. Thanks so much for sharing!
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Beautiful job with this...such a hard thing, I had a friend who lost two siblings to sids...love your journaling!
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I´m sooo sorry for your loss! The journalling made me cry almost! What a beautiful little girl she was!
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Very sweet. I love how you did your journaling. I am so sorry for your loss of such a beautiful little girl.
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This had to be really hard to create. BRAVO!
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Adorable...love the colors and the awesome pp..fab design! I'm so sorry for your lost. This is such a beautiful tribute to your neice!! (HUGS)
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Awwwwww....hormonal pregnant woman crying here. So so sorry about your beautiful Niece Rayanna. This is such a gorgeous layout of her and a beautiful tribute. {{{hugs}}} to you and well done on scrapping such a hard time in your life. Scrapping is therapy! Again London is just beautiful.
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((hugs)) This is a fantastic LO...what a great tribute to your niece..your journaling is gorgeous and so is little London. So glad you were able to do this!
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this is so adorable!
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Thank you for sharing a little bit of your niece with us! I've had to go back and reread a couple of times, can't make it all the way through it without boohooing. TFS
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You have made an awesome memorial layout of London. I am sitting here crying my eyes out. Awesome journaling. I know this could not have been easy to make.
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just awesome reya
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OMGoodness! Soooo sorry for the loss....nothing can replace a child....precious photos...so glad you have them. I hope scrapping these precious memories were a balm to your heart! Hugs!
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OMG!!! this brought a tear to my eye....the journaling is so wonderful!!! Great LO!!
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beautiful
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Wow. That must have been tough for you. I'm sure it was good therapy though. It's a beautiful lo & she's a beautiful baby. TFS.
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I shed a little tear. You have done this so beautifully, what a precious thing to have. Well done.
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This is beautiful;great that you could do this! I always say live like it's your last day!
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