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Posted on: Wednesday, 20 June 2007, 8:51am
Comment by: foxfam

The Top 5 Things You Don't
Want to Hear at an Amusement Park

"All the rides have been built and inspected to the high standards of the Halliburton Corporation."

"You must have at least this much medical insurance to ride this ride."

"There's all-you-can-eat Brunswick stew over by the triple-loop coaster."

"To fasten your seat belts, insert the flat end into the-- whoops, you're already moving! Enjoy the ride!"

and the Number 1 Thing You Don't Want to Hear at an Amusement Park...


"How do we reach your next of kin?"


Posted on: Tuesday, 5 June 2007, 8:17am
Comment by: foxfam

Kids' Books That Didn't Make It
A few children's books that didn't make the cut:

1. You Are Different and That's Bad
2. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables
3. Dad's New Wife Robert
4. Fun four-letter Words to Know and Share
5. Hammers, Screwdrivers and Scissors: An I-Can-Do-It Book
6. The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking
7. Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence
8. No Cats Go to Heaven
9. The Little Sissy Who Snitched
10. Some Kittens Can Fly
11. The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy
12. Whining, Kicking and Crying to Get Your Way
13. Pop! Goes The Hamster...And Other Great Microwave Games
14. Eggs, Toilet Paper, and Your School
15. Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things


Posted on: Thursday, 31 May 2007, 9:15am
Comment by: foxfam

THINGS THAT HALLMARK CARDS DON'T SAY!!!! (Thank Goodness!)
My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat
When I looked at the tire...
I noticed your cat.
Sorry!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be.
But don't fret about it...
She moved in with me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Looking back over the years
that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder...
"What the heck was I thinking?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I've always wanted to have
someone to hold,
someone to love.
After having met you ..
I've changed my mind.
--------------------------------------------------------
As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...
Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
You'll probably need it again.
**********************************************************
Happy birthday! You look great for your age.
Almost Lifelike!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm so miserable without you
it's almost like you're here.
=====================================================
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?
=====================================================
So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day.
Look at the bright side,
it's really good pay


Posted on: Monday, 21 May 2007, 1:33pm
Comment by: Meeee

I hope you have a FAB week!!


Posted on: Sunday, 13 May 2007, 8:48am
Comment by: Meeee

Happy happy Mother's day!!!!!!


Posted on: Wednesday, 9 May 2007, 12:38pm
Comment by: foxfam

Wednesday Funny: This 80 year old woman was arrested for shop lifting. When she went before the judge in Cincinnati he asked her, "What did you steal?" She replied, "A can of peaches."

The jud ge then asked her why she had stolen the can of peaches and she replied that she was hungry. The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can. She replied 6.

The judge then said, "I will then give yo u 6 days in jail."

Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment, the woman's husband spoke up and asked the judge if he could say something. The judge said, "What is it?"

The husband said, "She also stole a can of peas."


Posted on: Tuesday, 1 May 2007, 10:05am
Comment by: foxfam

Happy May! A guy falls asleep on the beach for several hours and gets a horrible sunburn. He goes to the hospital, and is promptly admitted after being diagnosed with second-degree burns. With his skin already starting to blister, and the severe pain he was in, the doctor prescribes continuous intravenous feeding with saline, electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra pill every four hours.

The nurse, who is rather astounded, says, "What good will Viagra do for him, Doctor?

The doctor replied, "It'll keep the sheets off his legs."


Posted on: Wednesday, 25 April 2007, 4:02pm
Comment by: foxfam

Children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Christian school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The teacher made a note, "Take only one apple, God is watching!" Moving through the line, to the other end of the table, was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A young boy wrote a note, "Take all you want, God is watching the apples."


Posted on: Tuesday, 17 April 2007, 9:03am
Comment by: foxfam

Tuesday Funny: They keep telling us to get in touch with our bodies....Mine isn't all tht communitive but I heard from it the other day after I said, "Body, how'd you like to go to the six o'clock class in vigorous toning?" Clear as a bell my body said, "Listen fatty....do it and die!"


Posted on: Friday, 13 April 2007, 1:27pm
Comment by: foxfam

Have a great weekend! I thought this was funny...If you love something set it free, if it comes back it will always be yours. If it doesn't come back, it never was yours to begin with.....BUT if it just sits in your living room, messes up your stuff, eats your food, uses your telephone, takes your money and doesn't appear to realize you set it free.....You either married it or gave birth to it!


Posted on: Thursday, 5 April 2007, 9:10am
Comment by: foxfam

Happy early b-day!


Posted on: Thursday, 5 April 2007, 9:10am
Comment by: foxfam

Just passing by with a little "funny" ~ The Easter Bunny had no idea what he was getting into when he took the job ~Somebody told him it was a great way to meet chicks! LOL! Have a blessed Holiday! Shans


Posted on: Thursday, 29 March 2007, 9:40am
Comment by: foxfam

Hope everything is FANTASTIC in your world today!


Posted on: Monday, 19 March 2007, 1:24pm
Comment by: foxfam

Stop'n by to give a BIG HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!


Posted on: Tuesday, 13 March 2007, 9:06am
Comment by: foxfam

Passing by to say "Hi"!


Posted on: Monday, 12 March 2007, 6:38am
Comment by: Divorced Mom of 4

Have a great week of scrappin................


Posted on: Tuesday, 6 March 2007, 12:34pm
Comment by: mOm23girls

just poppin' in to say hello!


Posted on: Tuesday, 6 March 2007, 11:14am
Comment by: foxfam

Spring is close! Don't forget to set your clock ahead this weekend...have a super week!


Posted on: Tuesday, 27 February 2007, 8:06am
Comment by: foxfam

Passing by your place to see if anyone is home!!! Have a happy week!


Posted on: Friday, 23 February 2007, 7:44am
Comment by: foxfam

Hope you have a superfantasicwonderful weekend!


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