"A DEATH IN THE FAMILY"

I listen to the room, straining hard to hear
Sounds of Life
Was that movement on the bed?
Senses
Absent with one exception, overwhelming
Fear
Unmoving, mind bare, eyes blind, I stare
Ahead
Into bleak silence blinking at spinning blank images
Unwritten----Unsaid
Thoughts churning, searing, clamoring
“Stop, Stop”
I whisper as I close my hands about my head
Deafening
Noise pounding, unrelenting
Discordant
Like cries of sinners eternally repenting
Pain, sharp pain beneath my left breast
Piercing
Assaulting my blistered heart
Stinging
Laboring to breathe, I murmur a remark denying the
Incapacitating
Grief enclosing; reality is so harsh and unkind
Insisting
It’sNotTrue-It’sNotTrue-It’sNotTrue
The deadly refrain invades my mind
Saturating
Blotting out reason and thought
Lacerating
Nightmare unbending unending
Not
My trembling hand ruffles the short grey hair on my husband’s
Head
“Love you, Sweetheart,” I said then lay my head next to his on the bed
Tenderly
“I’ll wake him up, now. Yes, I will
Should I?”
He’s-so-peaceful, so-quiet, so
Still
Lovingly I caress his still-warm face knowing his life has
Ceased
I’m not ready to accept but reason prevails and I cannot
Regret
That he’s resting in peace, suffering finished, his spirit and soul
Released
Our extraordinary loving journey reached its end
Abruptly
There’s been a death in our family
Regrettably
Everyone thought it was my husband who
Died
But how could that possibly
Be?
No, he wasn’t the family member who died it was
Me

Author: Carol Zic
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