- Pamelalynne Said:
My ex and I broke up last year after being together for 6 1/2 years. 3 months later after we break up, he's already married and going to afghan. He called out of the blue (since nathans last birthday (June 20th), has only called 3 times) and never wrote to him, nothing. But anyways, he's coming back from afghan. He wants me to put nathan on an airplane by ***himself*** and let him visit my ex in texas!!! (Stationed in ft. hood tx)
He's like "Well, nathan is old enough to travel on a plane by himself!" Um...he's 3 1/2 about to be 4!!!! Then he was like "Well, If you don't like that Idea, what about my mom taking him to come see me?" First of all, they havent seen nathan since september of 08. Nathan goes crazy, balling his eyes out if I, my mom or my dad leaves the room.
I want nathan to see his father, but I will not let him go see him by himself or with the grandma who doesn't even know him! I know that he has 30 days of leave after he comes back, why can't he come to florida and see him himself. You know what he tells me? "They won't let me come down to florida...meaning the army won't let me come."
Oh, and his new wife was my best friend from highschool. Now she is the one calling all the time saying "Since I am nathan's stepmother, I have a right to see him, and to talk to him!" Umm...no, you don't.
What should I do girls?
What a tough spot to be in! I think it's always best to act in the best-interest of the child. I think 3 is way too young to travel by himself (just think of all the screaming 3-year olds on planes WITH their parents!). It doesn't seem fair that your son should have to travel with strangers, either (the grandparents). I would request that the dad come out to visit DS, but as you said, he's not allowed to. As for the new "step mom", OMGosh! Talk about putting the child last. It sounds like she would rather frighten the child just to see and talk to him. I think whatever choice you make, it needs to be one that your son is comfortable with. Sure, it's important that he have a relationship with his father, but it seems to me that it should be his father who has to be challenged and inconveniced, and not the child! Your son isn't the one who moved out and remarried. He shouldn't be incovenienced or frightened by your ex's choices.
OK...getting off my soapbox now, lol! Good luck with this!