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Cheers
Give a Cheer
Give a Cheer
This is a story that we considered very profound because no matter how stressed we get, no matter how tired we are this life lesson should always be in the forefront of our minds; And we did not want to forget it; so I made a layout for my husband. I included the journaling here and be warned it is quite long.
Journaling: One young father shared this experience of how his wife was able to be proactive in a challenging situation with their son: I came home from work the other day, and my three-and-a-half-year-old son Brenton met me at the door. He was beaming. He said, ”Dad, I am a hardworking man!”; I later found out that while my wife had been downstairs, Brenton had emptied a one-and-a-half-gallon jug of water from the fridge, most of it on the floor. My wife's initial reaction had been to yell at him and spank him. But instead she stopped herself and said patiently, “Brenton, what were you trying to do?“ I was trying to be a helping man, “Mom,” he replied proudly. “What do you mean?“ she asked. ”I washed the dishes for you.” Sure enough, there on the kitchen table where all the dishes he had washed with the water from the water jug. “Well, honey, why did you use the water from the fridge?” ”I couldn't reach the water in the sink.” ”Oh!” she said. Then she looked around. “Well, what do you think you could do next time that would make less of a mess?” He thought about it for a minute. Then his face lit up. “I could do it in the bathroom!” he exclaimed. “The dishes might break in the bathroom,” she replied. “But how about this? What if you came and got me and I helped you move a chair in front of the kitchen sink so that you could do the work there?” “Good idea!” he exclaimed happily. “Now what shall we do with this mess?” she asked. “Well, he said thoughtfully, “we could use a lot of paper towels!” So she gave him some paper towels, and she went and got the mop. As she was telling me what happened, I realized how important it was that my wife had been able to catch herself between stimulus and response. She made a proactive choice. And she was able to do it because she thought about the end in mind. The important thing here is not having a clean floor. It's raising this boy. It took her about ten minutes to clean up the mess. If she had been reactive, it also would have taken her about ten minutes, but the difference would have been that Brenton would have met me at the door and said, “;Daddy, I am a bad boy!” Just think about the difference it made in this family for this woman to act instead of react! This little boy could have come out of this experience feeling guilty, embarrassed, and ashamed. But instead he felt affirmed, appreciated, loved. His good intentions and his desire to help were nurtured. He learned how to help in better ways. His whole attitude about himself and about helping in his home were positively affected by this interaction. How was this woman able to turn what could have been a very frustrating experience into an actual deposit into this little boys' Emotional Bank Account? As her husband observed, she had clear in her mind what was most important. It wasn't having a clean floor; it was raising that boy. She had a purpose that was bigger than her problem. And in that instant between what happened and her response to it, she was able to connect to that purpose. She acted with the end in mind. Excerpt from the book 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families by Stephen R. Covey
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Thanks for spreading positivity!
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February 13, 2004